Hello and welcome to really dumb things they say. I’m Barry Nussbaum.

James Madison University in Virginia, named after our founding father, is training student workers to recognize that people who identify as male, straight, cisgender, or Christian are oppressors, and they’re involved in the systemic subjugation of other social groups.

Let me read you from the list of the good guys and the bad guys. If you’re able-bodied, you’re an oppressor. If you are physically, mentally, emotionally, or learning disabled, you are a victim. If you’re between the ages of 30 to 50, you’re an oppressor. If you’re below 30 or older than 50, you’re a victim.

If your gender is male and you are cis-gendered, you’re an oppressor. If you’re a woman, transgender, non-binary, or genderqueer, not sure what that is, you’re a victim. If you’re heterosexual, you’re an oppressor. If you’re lesbian, gay, bisexual, asexual, or pansexual, you’re a victim. If you are heteroromantic, you are an oppressor. If you are homoromantic, aromantic bi, or pen romantic, you’re a victim.

I think you’re getting the idea. James Madison University is named after one of the most brilliant constitutional scholars in American history. Literally, James Madison must be rolling over in his grave. The school has gone completely insane by racially subjugating white people who happen to be Christian and straight and deciding that they are the bad people and all the other people are their victims.

Shame on you, James Madison University, this has really got to change, or parents pull out your kids and send them somewhere a little bit more sane. Would you please?